Dear randy, Love is an emotion experienced by the many and enjoyed by the few. I wanted to the tell you about my feelings in person but then I thought how much more personal it would be to put them down in a letter. It might seem old fashioned, but there is something special about the written word - somehow it seems a little more permanent and meaningful.
There are many things that I have been meaning to say to you but just haven't found the words until now. I feel that I lost a part of me....I lost my best friend.....my one and only....besides my kids YOU were the BEST THING TO EVER HAPPEN TO ME!!!!. I decided put down these words because I fucked up..never told you how much u ment to me...or took the time for you....the time u needed to feel loved and wanted.... never did I see it till you were gone! I don't blame you for leaving.a person can only handle so much heart ache and hurt before the give up....I am sorry that now your gone I see all the things you tried to show me....the songs you would play when you got in car....I actually hear and feel the words now....the little messages you would send me...I thought u did it just to do it...now I see u were trying to tell me something...its way late but I see it all! I'm soooo sorry I never did when u were here! I was ur white trash beautiful and I never saw it! if I could turn back time I would in a second just never hurt you the way I did..cuz I'm gonna have good memerories of you....and sad to say all you have of me is bad....that's why you gave up and left! I truely lost my best friend when you walked away! I do love you and will always! And as much as it hurts to say(cuz I know it was me once a time)I hope you find your happy ever after and live in happiness for all your life! I will always regret losing you..I truely think I lost my soal mate...when I lost you!. I was recently thinking of you at today "crash my party" came on...and its the way you use to feel toward me...kills me every time, You showed me what love truely was...my kids to...teaching Des how to drive playing with odie....I not only hurt you and myself but I also fucked up my kids lives....they love and was close to you ...never seen it till it was to late!. Your the way you loved me....the way you held me....the way YOU taught me what love truely is! makes me feel You made my world complete and whole...gave me the best years of my life...but my pride never let me tell you..
I understand that you have been facing some significant challenges lately such as I'm am truely sorry for how I did you for so long....how I hurt you and made you sad! , and that this would be making you feel I understand why you gave up and walked away....I don't hate or blame you.....I just pray one day you won't hate me...and maybe.....just maybe you will be "MY FRIEND" again!. My recent challenging I miss you everyday....every song every memory.....every picture....my heart hurts everyday...cuz of the pain I caused you that I never got to fix....the love you had for me that went away....it hurts for me and YOU! YOU MAY HAVE MOVED ON...BUT I'M STILL WONDERING HOW I WAS SOOO STUPID NOT TO SEE WHAT YOU WERE TRYING TO DO! has left me feeling like the biggest loser in the world!, and I do not want this to have any impact on our relationship. Whilst we have had our challenges I am looking foward to the future, and experiencing One day moving on and getting over you! I know beyond a doubt I WILL NEVER FOGET YOU but I'm hoping to be able to push it to the back the way I do everything else....but its alway in my face by either my mind...songs...pictures...or friends asking me bout you...learning to deal with fucking up the best thing in my life! together. Love always and foreve "jme"
No comments:
Post a Comment