Sunday, November 10, 2013

Love Letter For Tee

Dear Terrance, Love is something eternal… The aspect may change, but not the essence. I wanted to the tell you about my feelings in person but then I thought how much more personal it would be to put them down in a letter. It might seem old fashioned, but there is something special about the written word - somehow it seems a little more permanent and meaningful.

There are many things that I have been meaning to say to you but just haven't found the words until now. I feel that we could've made it with some tweaking of our relationship, but you dont love my kids like your own, and I think loving mines makes you think your not doing enough for yours. I decided to put down these words because i wish our love was enough. I was recently thinking of you at work, I felt that I could marry this man, he makes me so happy but at the same time he stumps down my spirit. I have two years left with my oldest and these should be happy after all we've been through and still going through. It's not over until we get real answers. She lost because she doesn't know the whole story and I dont either. That hurt will always stay fresh. We each others strenght in this misunderstanding, and until you walk our road you will never understand. I can't walk your road regarding the lost of your sister, or the wondering about your son thats your journey, I could have only stood by you and supported that journey.. Your Beautiful smile makes me want to smile because when your happy I'm happy.

I understand that you have been facing some significant challenges lately such as I know your heart and mind is with your kids and you're fighting an internal battle of right and wrong and thats ok, just dont step on mines in your fight, and that this would be making you feel you wish things were different I do to and I wish nothing but the best for you, just hope you wake up and realize this yourself before it's too late. . My recent challenging I've been wishing and hoping for a better and stronger bond between you, myself and my kids but I dont see it happening. Missed church last Sunday but from here on imma stay on top of it. I feel at peace and calm after and thankful for how far I've come. has left me feeling at peace and not as broken. I wish you was the missing piece to my puzzle but you not and I can't complete it if the piece doesnt fit, and I do not want this to have any impact on our relationship. Whilst we have had our challenges I am looking foward to the future, and experiences. I wish we could have gotten to a higher level in this relationship, that after all we've been thru i would be your everything, that I would be enough. I'm never enough for your liking and thats ok. Love Tee

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