Dear Jae, Love is indescribable and unconditional. I could tell you a thousand things that it is not, but not one that it is. I wanted to the tell you about my feelings in person but then I thought how much more personal it would be to put them down in a letter. It might seem old fashioned, but there is something special about the written word - somehow it seems a little more permanent and meaningful.
There are many things that I have been meaning to say to you but just haven't found the words until now. I feel that I am not the same that you remember. I have grown up into a man. A real man. I am ready. I want you Jae in my present and my future, I want you always and forever. I decided to put down these words because It's been quite awhile since I last saw you. I mean really saw you. I don't see you just through eyes. No we was more than that. I see you through my heart, your heart, through my feelings, through our connection. I see you through out touch, through my heart, even when my eyes is closed. In my sleep in my dreams. Jae I want to see you. I need to see you. I miss you. My heart longs for you. Jae I love you. I was recently thinking of you at the city county building, I thought about the day we got married. Yes it wasn't a big extravagant wedding. It may have just been the Justice of the peace but it was real to us and we were so happy. God we was crazy in love and no one could tell us anything. Still no one can because no matter what I will always be your superman and you my juicy boo. Your beautiful smile makes me feel warm, save, loved and happy.
I understand that you have been facing some significant challenges lately such as being loved and having a family. That you simply wish to love and be loved. Be appreciated and treated right. That you desire a beautiful family of your own. A real family. I know you want these things but you gotta be smart and safe Jae. In time it will all be yours. You don't have to look any further for everything you desire is right in front of you. Me Jae. Me. It has been so hard without you. Food seems tasteless, colors are dull, the moon is engulfed in the dark abandoned by stars, energy is so hard to come by. I feel so down, so heavy, even confused due to lack of focus. I am lost, even in my own crew I feel lost. Who am I? Where do I belong? At your side is my rightful place. I'm lost without you. I feel a great pain, one I cannot explain. I just know I hurt bad inside, and this is a pain I dont ever want to feel again. It's like dying but without dying, it just repeats itself constantly breaking me down. Honestly I dont know how much of me is left, and I do not want this to have any impact on our relationship. While we have had our challenges I am looking foward to the future, and our experiences. I look forward to the rest our lives, our future. Being successful as we raise our kids and watch them be successful. I look forward to living a lifetime of happiness with you. Together. Forever. Love Louie 
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